Global Warming Confirmed?

As I sit here in the Midwest with piles of snow and coldest temperatures in years, it’s hard to see global warming as a threat to our survival. However, the United Nations have found 50 scientists who say it’s absolutely happening. They went all around the world in search of the truth and came back with only 50 experts. Global warming is not a fact, but liberals and socialists around the globe say it is and that we caused it. They say it’s because of too much carbon dioxide.

Carbon dioxide is naturally occurring. Decaying plants give off carbon dioxide. We exhale carbon dioxide. So, how do we reduce the amount of carbon dioxide being produced? I have a couple suggestions.

First, instead of letting nature take its course with forests, let’s cut down old trees and use the lumber for useful things instead of letting trees fall down and rot. That will also minimize forest fires, which also produces carbon dioxide and smoke and soot. This would probably reduce carbon dioxide production by 20%. That last number is just an estimate because I’m a guesser not a scientist. Of course, carbon dioxide is absorbed by plants, which in turn gives back oxygen. So we may reduce carbon dioxide production and oxygen production at the same time. Oh well, you give a little and get a little.

Secondly, we could fire every politician and junk scientist in the world. With no paycheck for spouting useless garbage they would be exhaling less. I think that should reduce carbon dioxide by 30% or more.

Garbage, by the way, also disappears by decaying which gives off carbon dioxide. We could all pack our garbage in non-bio degradable plastic bags and store them in the buildings that were occupied by all those politicians and junk scientists. At least until a non-carbon dioxide producing way to eliminate it is found.

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