What do you call a blonde mother-in-law?
— An air bag.
The governor's mansion in Tennessee burned down!
— Yep. Pert' near took out the whole trailer park. The library was a total loss too. Both books-poof! up in flames and he hadn't even finished coloring one of them.
"Thank you for flying Delta Business Express. We hope you enjoyed giving us the business as much as we enjoyed taking you for a ride."
— Anonymous Delta Flight Attendant